Return of the King, second showing -part 2 (unspoilery)

[timepiececlock]

Liek, omg, Aragorn is Jeesus! And Legolas is his big gay love interest that was cut out of the Bible because Arwen's hair went better with the headdress! But nevermind, because Aragorn is so Jesus! And Eowyn is the Last Scion! And Sam's real name is Rufus, can't you tell?!/1!?!11!! And I was lying before, Legolas was really going to be in there anyway (because God is like, SO a pro-gay marriage activist on her weekends off) but while loving JeesusAragorn he was also shaggin Eowyn on the side, because, let's face it, chicks with swords turn everyone on, and he's so gorgeous that her pervy old Uncle wouldn't leave him alone either, and soon JeesusAragorn got depressed for lack of LegoLuv and tied himself to an Orc catapult and was about to die like a lamb when Frodo gave him some bit of shiny jewelry and said "Here, this should cheer you up--BUT DON'T YOU BE KEEPING IT!" And then Aragorn's soul was lost and when the dust settled God Galadriel in her fabulous backlighting looked around, decided Legolas was too pretty to be real, had him cut out of the bible entirely and shunted into some trashy long-winded dime-novel from early 20th century that everyone just pretends to read. But who cares, because, liek, omg, Aragorn is Jeesus!




edit: Rashaka wants to inform general LJ public that she is, in fact, and atheist, in case this post confused anyone.

Comments

[dettiot.livejournal.com]

[snort] This was too too funny. Ultra-Christian fangirls rule. :-)

[rashaka.livejournal.com]

Actually, I'm an atheist.

[dettiot.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm sorry--I didn't mean to imply that you were ultra-Christian. I didn't explain myself well--I meant to say that it was what an ultra-Christian fangirl might write about ROTK. Sorry about that. :-( [Melissa reminds herself to think before hitting 'post comment']

[rashaka.livejournal.com]

It's not an apology-needing kind of thing, so don't worry about it. Plus, it'd be silly of me to take insult at what I perceived as that innocent assumption, given what I just posted. But you're right, Ultra-Christian fangirls can be VERY funny. I wasn't mocking them in particular though; I was mostly mocking Aragorn's hair. :grin:

while I have you here...

[rashaka.livejournal.com]

::glomps you::

Thank you thank you for the LJ piad account time gift! I'm so touched!

[dettiot.livejournal.com]

[giggle] Aragorn's hair is as much a miracle as Legolas'.

Re: while I have you here...

[dettiot.livejournal.com]

You're most welcome! Just my way to spread some holiday cheer. :-)