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it's always ourselves we find in the sea
Oct. 23rd, 2003
it's always ourselves we find in the sea
(no subject)
Oct. 23rd, 2003 08:35 amDamn. I just accidentally read someone's non-spoilery "Angel sucked so bad last night" post. And then two posts down I read someone else's non-spoilery "Angel was great last night and my brain is melting through my ears" post. Both by people whom I like and respect. Unfortunately, the first one is sticking in my head. And I haven't even seen the damn episode yet. Why does that always happen? The bad impression has more power than the good impression, when setting up your mood/mindset for upcoming episodes. Damn it. And usually I'm so freakin optimistic and easy-to-please that it's ridiculous. Why can't I just think more about the person who adored it? That would be the best for me. But now my expectations are tainted, and I'm going to be automatically deconstructing it, analyzing it so much that I overexaggerate things that otherwise would hardly annoy me at all, and genuinely ruin the whole thing for myself.
(no subject)
Oct. 23rd, 2003 12:38 pmI sat in the main quad today eating my lunch on a bench (where did you go, ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
lin_lin_lucy?), when another girl/ young woman came and sat beside me. She was black, about my height (5'7"), long slim legs, narrow waist and curvy hips and shoulders. I looked at her when she sat down, and was surprised to see one of the most beautiful women/girls I've seen in person. She had hair that was a just-faintly-there fuzz (probably had shaved her head recently), large round eyes, round lips, and slightly crooked teeth that somehow didn't make her any less attractive. It was like looking at a profile of a African princess, in American clothes with an American demeanor, and I had a flash moment of real feminime jealousy. I thought "I might never be that pretty." But I was in a good mood (having just gotten a free mini-massage), and we exchanged smiling hellos. She even had a nice voice, very smooth and feminine. I continued to read a little more of my history books and finished my soda, and then as I left I reccomended that she try out the free mini full-body massages that the massage department was giving out to students on tables just behind us. She said she had already signed up and was waiting. I told her it would be good (mine was), and went on my way.
Isn't it odd, when you think about it, the way we perceive beauty? Would a heterosexual man have found this woman as exotically pretty as I, a heterosexual woman, did? She looked nothing like what American consumerism tells us to like (sharp-featured blond white women with middle-long hair), but she was one of the most attractive people I've ever met in person.
lin_lin_lucy?), when another girl/ young woman came and sat beside me. She was black, about my height (5'7"), long slim legs, narrow waist and curvy hips and shoulders. I looked at her when she sat down, and was surprised to see one of the most beautiful women/girls I've seen in person. She had hair that was a just-faintly-there fuzz (probably had shaved her head recently), large round eyes, round lips, and slightly crooked teeth that somehow didn't make her any less attractive. It was like looking at a profile of a African princess, in American clothes with an American demeanor, and I had a flash moment of real feminime jealousy. I thought "I might never be that pretty." But I was in a good mood (having just gotten a free mini-massage), and we exchanged smiling hellos. She even had a nice voice, very smooth and feminine. I continued to read a little more of my history books and finished my soda, and then as I left I reccomended that she try out the free mini full-body massages that the massage department was giving out to students on tables just behind us. She said she had already signed up and was waiting. I told her it would be good (mine was), and went on my way.Isn't it odd, when you think about it, the way we perceive beauty? Would a heterosexual man have found this woman as exotically pretty as I, a heterosexual woman, did? She looked nothing like what American consumerism tells us to like (sharp-featured blond white women with middle-long hair), but she was one of the most attractive people I've ever met in person.