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timepiececlock::headdesk::
They've aged the youngest, Bean, to 9 or 10? .... Does that make Ender 11? And it all takes place in a year?
It's begun. The making of my next favorite book into a science fiction film.
The last five years have brought us LOTR and and Hitchhiker's Guide, the former of which was wonderful and the latter of which was just okay. That's 2 out of my 4 favorite books/series ever.
And now Ender's Game is starting to go forward.
DAMN.
After that the only thing left to pillage from my heart for the purpose of movie-making is The Dark Tower. And if that EVER happens, they sure as hell better get Hugh Jackman to be Roland Deshain or there will be killing. Fields of blood coating the beaches of Midworld and Mejis, my friends. And, as a side note, I'd love it if they could get what's her name from Firefly to be Susannah.
Back to Ender's Game, though...
For those who haven't read Ender's Game, and would like a bit of background:
Ender Wiggin is kind of exactly like that. Only he went to a government school for military officer training, and they didn't learn ninja stuff. But he was 6 years old, and he is smarter than you, smarter than Veronica Mars, smarter than just about everyone. Imagine a six year old Kakashi with the heart of Naruto and the temperament of Hinata and Gaara combined. And if Ender were in Narutoverse, he'd grown up to be Kakashi&Shikamaru combined, and then he'd be Hokage by 18.*
Wolfgang Peterson is directing. He's done The Perfect Storm, which I liked. And Outbreak, which I liked. He's also done Troy, which I *didn't* like. Troy also doesn't set a great precedent for book adaptations.
Mostly, I'm worried EG could turn into a spectacle film. The list above is all made of spectacle films. Sure, it takes place in space. But the aliens are off-screen and 90% of the book occurs in a school. A SCHOOL. ON A REMOTE SPACESHIP. Not a lot of spectacle, there. Mostly EG is an introspective book about the relationships between children and their teachers, children and their peers, and children and society. It's also about war and genocide and what it means to be the smartest kid in the class. It's also, incidentally, kind of violent. In two places, but the second one is more important than the first one. And let me tell you this: it happens in a shower.
Nobody wants to watch a movie with children about children where there's a violent scene in a public shower. They're gonna edit this book, and I'm gonna drag my own ass kicking and screaming to the theater, and when I get there I'm going to sit in the front row and throw popcorn at the screen and talk in loud voices. Earn my ticket to the special hell.
Because they'll be ruining a book so wonderful that I finished it in two days and have reread it four times. It was my first "change your life perspective" book. You know, one of the books you mark the passing of time by. Or maybe that's just me who marks time with books. But it was the only book I've actively pimped out to everyone I know and run around saying "READ THIS BOOK NOW IT WILL OWN YOU."
Oh well. Maybe there'll be some funny Penny Arcade strips written about it, at least.
To sum up this post I'm using my Naruto "Thursday's Child" icon. Which, if you've read Ender's Game, is oddly appropriate.
*sooner or later I can cross Naruto with ANY fandom.
They've aged the youngest, Bean, to 9 or 10? .... Does that make Ender 11? And it all takes place in a year?
It's begun. The making of my next favorite book into a science fiction film.
The last five years have brought us LOTR and and Hitchhiker's Guide, the former of which was wonderful and the latter of which was just okay. That's 2 out of my 4 favorite books/series ever.
And now Ender's Game is starting to go forward.
DAMN.
After that the only thing left to pillage from my heart for the purpose of movie-making is The Dark Tower. And if that EVER happens, they sure as hell better get Hugh Jackman to be Roland Deshain or there will be killing. Fields of blood coating the beaches of Midworld and Mejis, my friends. And, as a side note, I'd love it if they could get what's her name from Firefly to be Susannah.
Back to Ender's Game, though...
For those who haven't read Ender's Game, and would like a bit of background:
A Naruto analogy is the easiest thing that comes to mind. You know how Kakashi was so smart and talented that he passed the Chuunin exam at 6 years old?
Ender Wiggin is kind of exactly like that. Only he went to a government school for military officer training, and they didn't learn ninja stuff. But he was 6 years old, and he is smarter than you, smarter than Veronica Mars, smarter than just about everyone. Imagine a six year old Kakashi with the heart of Naruto and the temperament of Hinata and Gaara combined. And if Ender were in Narutoverse, he'd grown up to be Kakashi&Shikamaru combined, and then he'd be Hokage by 18.*
Wolfgang Peterson is directing. He's done The Perfect Storm, which I liked. And Outbreak, which I liked. He's also done Troy, which I *didn't* like. Troy also doesn't set a great precedent for book adaptations.
Mostly, I'm worried EG could turn into a spectacle film. The list above is all made of spectacle films. Sure, it takes place in space. But the aliens are off-screen and 90% of the book occurs in a school. A SCHOOL. ON A REMOTE SPACESHIP. Not a lot of spectacle, there. Mostly EG is an introspective book about the relationships between children and their teachers, children and their peers, and children and society. It's also about war and genocide and what it means to be the smartest kid in the class. It's also, incidentally, kind of violent. In two places, but the second one is more important than the first one. And let me tell you this: it happens in a shower.
Nobody wants to watch a movie with children about children where there's a violent scene in a public shower. They're gonna edit this book, and I'm gonna drag my own ass kicking and screaming to the theater, and when I get there I'm going to sit in the front row and throw popcorn at the screen and talk in loud voices. Earn my ticket to the special hell.
Because they'll be ruining a book so wonderful that I finished it in two days and have reread it four times. It was my first "change your life perspective" book. You know, one of the books you mark the passing of time by. Or maybe that's just me who marks time with books. But it was the only book I've actively pimped out to everyone I know and run around saying "READ THIS BOOK NOW IT WILL OWN YOU."
Oh well. Maybe there'll be some funny Penny Arcade strips written about it, at least.
To sum up this post I'm using my Naruto "Thursday's Child" icon. Which, if you've read Ender's Game, is oddly appropriate.
*sooner or later I can cross Naruto with ANY fandom.
