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timepiececlockSo I was reading this from ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
eliade's journal, a longish article about nerds during school years, what makes a nerd and why nerds are picked on. I thought it was interesting, and I'm only about half way.
Because they're at the bottom of the scale, nerds are a safe target for the entire school. If I remember correctly, the most popular kids don't persecute nerds; they don't need to stoop to such things. Most of the persecution comes from kids lower down, the nervous middle classes.
See, this I disagree with. For somebackground: I went to a public middle school, and sixth grade was, yes, my hell-year. I was picked on only a little bit, by one group, less than 10 times in the whole year. The rest of my turmoil was mostly being shunned. Partly for being a nerd, though it wasn't all brains & glasses (because I wasn't really into computers at the time, and yeah I had glasses and was smart, but I didn't carry a calculator in my pocket). Mostly though, it was because my "prettier" best friend moved on to higher pastures, populated by cows & dogs that didn't want me in thier group, just wanted my friend. I told her that they were shallow, and she chose them, leavng me out in the cold of frienddom.
But on the first day of seventh grade I walked up to two new girls (twins), and made myself a pair of new best friends, who lasted for the rest of middle school. At that point, I was what this guy called "middle-class". Maybe, lower-middle. I was often ignored, but I wasn't picked on. I was called a know-it-all or bitch a few times for reasons no one would explain to me (I think it was because I talked in class instead of batting my eyes and saying "Oh, I don't knooowww...."), but I was able to happily ignore the popular and unpopular kids, and just have my friends.
And I didn't notice that "middle-class" kids picked on others-- it always seemed that the popular kids tore each other apart, and then they all tore at the unpopular kids, and the unpopular kids often had internal abusing, but the main 70% of the kids were ignored by both top and bottom groups. Or, as I often noticed, a middle-person would have a few in-class friends who were popular, and a few in-class friends who were geeks, because they felt free to like the geeks, and they didn't mind searching out the nicer of the popular kids.
The article goes on that all geeks wwre smart and all unpopular kids were geeks who were cast out for being smart-- not true. The unpopular arena had two very distinct groups-- nerds and freaks. Some were both, but not everyone was unpopular because of brains.
Going into high school was different; I noticed the lines blurred a lot, and people had friends in many different groups. I hung out wiht a lot of band kids and some of the anime geeks, but no one picked on the anime geeks because there were about 8 of us, and we had other friends outside that group. And the goth kids had all their own little inter-group social dramas, so nobody needed someone percieved to be from another social "status level" to have turmoil.
Mostly, by high school I noticed the most popular kids were the ones who were smart and socially outgoing.
But yeah, even watching from the relatively-immune middle class, I hated middle scool. It was horrible, what kids did to each toher. What the extra-popular kids did to the dorkiest, geekiest kids, and what the populars did to each other. I swore in high school to never deal with "interpersonal drama shit", and as a plan, it worked out nicely.
eliade's journal, a longish article about nerds during school years, what makes a nerd and why nerds are picked on. I thought it was interesting, and I'm only about half way.Because they're at the bottom of the scale, nerds are a safe target for the entire school. If I remember correctly, the most popular kids don't persecute nerds; they don't need to stoop to such things. Most of the persecution comes from kids lower down, the nervous middle classes.
See, this I disagree with. For somebackground: I went to a public middle school, and sixth grade was, yes, my hell-year. I was picked on only a little bit, by one group, less than 10 times in the whole year. The rest of my turmoil was mostly being shunned. Partly for being a nerd, though it wasn't all brains & glasses (because I wasn't really into computers at the time, and yeah I had glasses and was smart, but I didn't carry a calculator in my pocket). Mostly though, it was because my "prettier" best friend moved on to higher pastures, populated by cows & dogs that didn't want me in thier group, just wanted my friend. I told her that they were shallow, and she chose them, leavng me out in the cold of frienddom.
But on the first day of seventh grade I walked up to two new girls (twins), and made myself a pair of new best friends, who lasted for the rest of middle school. At that point, I was what this guy called "middle-class". Maybe, lower-middle. I was often ignored, but I wasn't picked on. I was called a know-it-all or bitch a few times for reasons no one would explain to me (I think it was because I talked in class instead of batting my eyes and saying "Oh, I don't knooowww...."), but I was able to happily ignore the popular and unpopular kids, and just have my friends.
And I didn't notice that "middle-class" kids picked on others-- it always seemed that the popular kids tore each other apart, and then they all tore at the unpopular kids, and the unpopular kids often had internal abusing, but the main 70% of the kids were ignored by both top and bottom groups. Or, as I often noticed, a middle-person would have a few in-class friends who were popular, and a few in-class friends who were geeks, because they felt free to like the geeks, and they didn't mind searching out the nicer of the popular kids.
The article goes on that all geeks wwre smart and all unpopular kids were geeks who were cast out for being smart-- not true. The unpopular arena had two very distinct groups-- nerds and freaks. Some were both, but not everyone was unpopular because of brains.
Going into high school was different; I noticed the lines blurred a lot, and people had friends in many different groups. I hung out wiht a lot of band kids and some of the anime geeks, but no one picked on the anime geeks because there were about 8 of us, and we had other friends outside that group. And the goth kids had all their own little inter-group social dramas, so nobody needed someone percieved to be from another social "status level" to have turmoil.
Mostly, by high school I noticed the most popular kids were the ones who were smart and socially outgoing.
But yeah, even watching from the relatively-immune middle class, I hated middle scool. It was horrible, what kids did to each toher. What the extra-popular kids did to the dorkiest, geekiest kids, and what the populars did to each other. I swore in high school to never deal with "interpersonal drama shit", and as a plan, it worked out nicely.
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Re: re: nerds
Date: 2003-02-21 09:31 am (UTC)That school system must be quite unique because the majority of school follow the "social code" you described.
Interesting. I'd wondered sometimes, because you hear about other schools where cliques were such a problem. It always made me wonder because in my schools cliques were only an issue to a smaller portion of the population; the majority didn't bother with "clique wars". Any time there were major disagreements that went bad, it was usually one person to one person, not a group to a group. It was never to the degree that it seems to be portrayed in movies.
I loved when you said "I swore in high school to never deal with "interpersonal drama shit", and as a plan, it worked out nicely." I have a friend who spent all year working her way up to the "popular crowd" and now she calls everyday to whine about the "drama of the day" and who said what about her behind your back.
Oh, how annoying. I just in 10th grade watched this whole big drama thing happen (it wasn't between two extra-popular kids I knew, it was between a goth kid I liked and a close friend of mine), and seeing that go down, I swore I did not want to have to deal with that crap on top of everything else ever again. So I went though high school without any real "enemies" that other people seemed to have. I just stayed away from people I didn't like.