I'd like to pose a question to the masses of LJdom

[timepiececlock]

Is it possible to have a straightforward discussion of the validity of slash as a character ship (not a fandom ship), without having people get upset?

Sometimes I'd like to sit down with yaoi (slash) fans of Gundam Wing and debate with them why Heero and Duo are not gay, but Quatre and Trowa might be. Or with Highlander, why I do think Methos did it with Byron, but not with Duncan. Or the canon-based exptrapolation of Spike/Angel versus Spike/Xander-- or, if one were so inclined, why none of those work and everyone is straight unless explicitly and irrevicably stated otherwise, or vice versa.

But it seems that slash discussions between people who disagree on whether a slash pairing is valid as a "conventional" couple instead of an unconvention/fandom-based one, always go badly-- and then no one ever really gets to hear the other side's reasons.

Is it just that it's an argument best had in person, where you can read each other's expressions and not take offense so easily?

Do people censor themselves and not try to talk about it, for fear of starting an unintended argument?

Is there a way to say "I don't believe in your ship, you don't believe in mine, let's talk about it and explore why" without the conversation eventually getting bitter?

Do slash fans and het fans even want to have discussion and debate about it?

Or is it like putting Pro-Life-ers in a room with Pro-choice-ers and telling them to talk about only abortion: there will be blood and vitriol no matter how good your intentions?

Comments

[rusty_halo.livejournal.com]

I think part of the problem is that people come into these discussions with many different underlying assumptions (that apply to very personal aspects of human life), so it's very easy to get offended or to offend someone inadventently.

For example, do you think that engaging in any sexual act with a person of the same gender automatically makes a character "gay"? Do you think that people can always easily be divided into "gay" and "straight"? Do you automatically assume that every character is "straight" unless explicitly shown otherwise? Do you believe that everyone has the potential to be attracted to anyone, regardless of gender? Do you think that gender is culturally constructed and that "gay" and "straight" are just categories that we need to get beyond? How people feel about these issues will have a strong impact on the way they discuss the issue--and misunderstandings or misinterpretations can happen so easily.

Do you think that the only meaningful interpretation of a text is the one that the author intended? Or do you think that the text belongs to the viewers to interpret, and the author's intent is irrelevant? How you feel about that is going to have a big impact on how you feel about non-canonical pairings.

It seems that many people come into these arguments without even realizing that the other person could have a completely different underlying belief about the value of the author's intent, or about the nature of human sexuality, or about whatever else that's behind their opinion. This leads to lots of arguments that just go in circles, because the people aren't looking any deeper to try and find the real source of their disagreement. They're just going, "You're wrong!" or "You're sexist!" or "You're homophobic!" or whatever.