Troy... ::snert::
Jun. 27th, 2004 11:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
timepiececlockShakaMom: Look, it says "Inspired by Homer's The Illiad"
Rashaka: *giggle* Yeah, it would have have to.
Okay, the set design and costumes were good.
The boats were pretty.
The men were prettier. In fact, I enjoyed the constant exploitation of the male form. Very Greek.
All those back muscles. And shoulders. And hips. And me constantly hoping they'd drop the camera just a bit.
The fighting was good but not as emotionally evoking as Braveheart, or Lord of the Rings, or even Gladiator. In fact I was very little emotionally involved in the movie, except on Hector's behalf. I spent the whole movie crushing on Eric Bana. Orlando Bloom was pretty (real pretty, like really really), but Hector had the full package: hotness, honor, charm, hotness, looks good even scruffy, honor, a good leader, hotness, tall, honor, and likes kids.
For once there was a movie where Brad Pitt evoked nothing lusty from me. Wow. I'm kinda shocked. Guess I need to go back and rewatch something where he's in a suit.
Odysseus.... Sean Bean! And looking thinner than he did as Boromir. I never expected it, but he looked good scruffy. Like, hella good. I was kinda crushing on him almost as much as Hector.
Speaking of the boys...nice hair! Everyone had rich curly hair. The woman who was Achilles's lover was attractive too, in a refreshingly unconventional way: as far to the opposite of Helen as you could get without changing ethnicity. And speaking of Helen... prettier than I expected from the trailer, but not striking enough. But I guess Halle Berry doesn't really look Greek. Still, it's too bad. This movie was a chance for them to cast someone really amazing, someone really exotic and charismatic and phenominally beautiful. Instead it was a generic blond starlet who, while beautiful, looks like every other blond starlet. Not a face to sail a thousand ships.
And now that I've dawdled talking about the attractiveness factor of the cast... down to the hard part: the plot.
Oh, please, make it stop!
Dude, they had me for the first hour. Minus the "cousin" thing which I can forgive with a giggle and the thing with the captive girl looking about 16, and the whole Menelaus *dying* thing, I was enjoying the film and waiting for more scenes of Hector and/or Oddyseus.
But after Priam went to get Hector's body... well, everything after that was worthy of wank.
I want to start on the timeline, but... where would I even begin? Those of you who have even read summaries, like me, know how much it was changed. People dying at the wrong times. People dying who lived. People getting killed by the wrong people.
...People invading the cities when they should have been dead long before that point.
::sigh::
Oh well. At least that asshat Agamemnon was still killed by a woman.
I cut for spoiler content because the changes are so wild that even if you know the story inside and out it still constitutes spoilers. How about that?
It's not a *bad* movie. The production was gorgeous, and the acting strong. The cast was top-notch (minus Helen) and the cinematography was decent. It's probably alright to the uninitiated (which I assumed I was having only read the Oddysey and summaries of The Illiad, but even I knew enough to be facepalming the whole way through the second hour), but it's no Braveheart. It was unable to capture the passion of the audience. Or more precisely of me as an audience member. The whole thing just.... ::laugh:: I am not able to take it seriously.
And I'm normally pretty flexible about changes from book to film-- I thought the first two Harry Potter movies that I've seen didn't change enough. But this just became silly after a point.
"Inspired." ::snert::
Rashaka: *giggle* Yeah, it would have have to.
Okay, the set design and costumes were good.
The boats were pretty.
The men were prettier. In fact, I enjoyed the constant exploitation of the male form. Very Greek.
All those back muscles. And shoulders. And hips. And me constantly hoping they'd drop the camera just a bit.
The fighting was good but not as emotionally evoking as Braveheart, or Lord of the Rings, or even Gladiator. In fact I was very little emotionally involved in the movie, except on Hector's behalf. I spent the whole movie crushing on Eric Bana. Orlando Bloom was pretty (real pretty, like really really), but Hector had the full package: hotness, honor, charm, hotness, looks good even scruffy, honor, a good leader, hotness, tall, honor, and likes kids.
For once there was a movie where Brad Pitt evoked nothing lusty from me. Wow. I'm kinda shocked. Guess I need to go back and rewatch something where he's in a suit.
Odysseus.... Sean Bean! And looking thinner than he did as Boromir. I never expected it, but he looked good scruffy. Like, hella good. I was kinda crushing on him almost as much as Hector.
Speaking of the boys...nice hair! Everyone had rich curly hair. The woman who was Achilles's lover was attractive too, in a refreshingly unconventional way: as far to the opposite of Helen as you could get without changing ethnicity. And speaking of Helen... prettier than I expected from the trailer, but not striking enough. But I guess Halle Berry doesn't really look Greek. Still, it's too bad. This movie was a chance for them to cast someone really amazing, someone really exotic and charismatic and phenominally beautiful. Instead it was a generic blond starlet who, while beautiful, looks like every other blond starlet. Not a face to sail a thousand ships.
And now that I've dawdled talking about the attractiveness factor of the cast... down to the hard part: the plot.
Oh, please, make it stop!
Dude, they had me for the first hour. Minus the "cousin" thing which I can forgive with a giggle and the thing with the captive girl looking about 16, and the whole Menelaus *dying* thing, I was enjoying the film and waiting for more scenes of Hector and/or Oddyseus.
But after Priam went to get Hector's body... well, everything after that was worthy of wank.
I want to start on the timeline, but... where would I even begin? Those of you who have even read summaries, like me, know how much it was changed. People dying at the wrong times. People dying who lived. People getting killed by the wrong people.
...People invading the cities when they should have been dead long before that point.
::sigh::
Oh well. At least that asshat Agamemnon was still killed by a woman.
I cut for spoiler content because the changes are so wild that even if you know the story inside and out it still constitutes spoilers. How about that?
It's not a *bad* movie. The production was gorgeous, and the acting strong. The cast was top-notch (minus Helen) and the cinematography was decent. It's probably alright to the uninitiated (which I assumed I was having only read the Oddysey and summaries of The Illiad, but even I knew enough to be facepalming the whole way through the second hour), but it's no Braveheart. It was unable to capture the passion of the audience. Or more precisely of me as an audience member. The whole thing just.... ::laugh:: I am not able to take it seriously.
And I'm normally pretty flexible about changes from book to film-- I thought the first two Harry Potter movies that I've seen didn't change enough. But this just became silly after a point.
"Inspired." ::snert::
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no subject
Date: 2004-06-28 05:58 pm (UTC)I don't know, I found Helen's actress to be kind of blah...I mean, I personally thought Briseis (Achilles' captive) was prettier. *shrug* Was it a requirement for Helen to have been a blond? I've been trying to get my hands on a copy of the Illiad ever since I saw Troy about three weeks ago (my town is very depraved ^^*), so I'm not sure.
I was suspicious about the cousin thing, and I haven't even read the book yet *grin*
Paris was hilarious -- I know what you mean about really, really pretty, but I loved his acting (I heard Paris was supposed to be a coward?). He was actually quite hilarious. I wanted to cry for Hector. Embarassingly enough, I was in love with the Achilles/Briseis storyline (even though I know it's non-existent in The Illiad ^_^*). And I'm kind of hoping for a sequel (The Odyssey? Think they might do it?)...I dunno, I want to see Odysseus again!
So in short, you're completely right, it's a gooood movie, just not an IT movie. Wah.
no subject
Date: 2004-06-28 07:01 pm (UTC)