Okay, my mind may be skewed from years of internet use, but...I don't think so. Someone saying, "I love your cock" or "I want to suck your cock"...that's hot. And in my crazy mind, kind of sweet.
Also, I am just wary of euphemisms in general, and especially in sex writing. Just say it--the simpler the better. Things like "hard member" or whatever just end up being silly (that one in particular always has me going, "Member of what?")
I think if one person can love another person, and love their body in all its crudity--call a cock a cock--then that's romantic to me. *shrug*
I'm not at all used to hearing the word cock or dick, and when I do hear it it's mostly in very inappropriate ways that are intended to make the listener uncomfortable. If it's only been used crudely around you, you think of it as crude. I think if you've built a comfort level with your lover around the word than it can be completely appropriate and sexy, but it's harder for a writer to build that comfort level with us in their story - they're trying not to scare off the people who only see cock as a violent way of talking about the penis, rather than a romantic way. Personally, I think the easiest way to build a comfort level with us, the readers, is to simply use penis in the description, and let the characters say whatever is IC for them (whether that's saying 'I love your dick' or not). We suspend our comfort level for the character's communication, but not the writer's - usually. Am I making any sense?
Yes, hard member is just bad. Making it too abstract takes away the intimacy of the writing and ruins your intent when it comes to conveying the smut.
Yes--every word carries a different connotation with each reader, and sexual words are especially, um, loaded. But since we're talking smut here, I have to say that I do find "penis" to be too clinical--or worse, comical. (C'mon! It's a funny word!) "Cock" on the other hand, is hot--maybe in part because it's a little dirty, a little crude. But then hot does not necessarily equal romantic, so...
This is why I'm really curious to know specifically what context rashaka is wanting to use the magic-penis-word in. *eg*
Huh. It's come down to tastes at this point; penis, for me, is far hotter than cock, and it doesn't feel like the writer is avoiding actually confronting what they're dealing with. I sometimes think that smut writers get as abstract, flowery or just plain crude to save themselves from the embarrassment of writing sex. I like a writer that doesn't hide behind that sort of language.
I find myself unable to separate the word 'cock' from the image of a rooster, or (sexually speaking) a dark sex scene, akin to rape. I have no idea why the sexual connotation is that way for me - it just is.
Hahahaha, oh yeah. Context might be important, here. *hits self*
I sometimes think that smut writers get as abstract, flowery or just plain crude to save themselves from the embarrassment of writing sex.
What? Um? Hey, did someone say my name? No? No one did? Okay then, I'll just go run and hide this... what? I don't have any fanfiction behind my back. I'm not hiding anything. Oh, look, it's a flying purple people eater! ::runs off::
This is my devious way of "secretly" pointing fingers at you. XD *ACCUSATION.*
But, really, we're all guilty of this, I think. Sex really is difficult to address, no matter how much we try to desensitize ourselves to it. Just listen in on one high school conversation to know what I mean. ;D
The weird thing is that I sometimes do that with action scenes too. For either sex or action, I don't want to write the A-B-C-D play by play, so I get abstract and flowery, or I pinpoint some small details while passing over others. I've basically accepted this about my writing, at least for right now in my life.
Not that weird! XD Either you don't want to get caught up in the details, or you're uncomfortable going into it. It's not bad, but it's also something to experiment with and see how detailed you can make your writing without dragging down the story, etc. I think it all depends on your experience with the subject at hand.
To me, "cock" or "dick" are crude or not depending majorly on who's speaking. For Spike and Buffy, it's hot. Spike was *made* to go around making words like "cock" and "cunt" sound unbelievably sexy. But that's because Spike's kind of crude any way. With other characters, not so much I find.
Also, I am just wary of euphemisms in general, and especially in sex writing. Just say it--the simpler the better. Things like "hard member" or whatever just end up being silly (that one in particular always has me going, "Member of what?")
I have the same problem. I didn't really expect to get anything useful out of this post, but there was always the slim hope that someone might inform me of the brilliant and perfect word I'd never thought of before that manages to be romantic without being crude or ridiculous.
The two characters are about 15 and 17, respectively, and it's a first time for both of them, and neither have very much experience before this of anything more than kissing, and not much of that. It's very spur-of-the-moment situational (at a forest camp site, actually), and while they've known each other for a while it's not been on the best of terms so they're not even really sure if they like each other when all is said and done, but they're both kind of emotionally vulnerable at the time and very caught up in the moment.
I haven't written sentences where I need a cut-and-replace word, if that's what you're asking. It's just right now the language is more abstract and poetical, and last night I was thinking I wanted to make the descriptions more literal/concrete, but trying to think of sentences and being unhappy drove me to post.
Ah, gotcha. Well, I can offer to beta the scene for you if you want (wow! the one time I'll be able to use the "has written a lotta smut" line on my resume!). Otherwise, I'd suggest avoiding more concrete description if it makes you uncomfortable. That's not necessarily too hard. There are even instances where you can get away with "him" for penis and it's perfectly clear that you're not, y'know, talking about the whole dude: "She took him into her hand." That sort of thing.
And hey, I finally thought of another penis-word that I don't hate: shaft. It's not very versatile, though. You don't want to be, like, "She looked down at his shaft." *snicker*
Ooh! Or, you could play up the hardness angle. And...that's probably more advice than you really wanted from me.
There are even instances where you can get away with "him" for penis and it's perfectly clear that you're not, y'know, talking about the whole dude: "She took him into her hand." That sort of thing.
I've noticed that before as a potential alternative that doesn't always fall into silly or crude.
You don't want to be, like, "She looked down at his shaft."
Thanks to you I'm going to be thinking about that line and cracking up ALL DAY. It'll randomly come out in conversations: "So I went to Albertsons and she looked down at his shaft."
All I can think of is the Yiddish term for it, and that's more corny/confusing than anything - it might break the mood of the fic. No, scratch that, it will break the mood. *Yiddish equals fail*
The use of manhood, love root, maiden-head seeker, rod of power (snerks) and love muscle have always made me giggle when I'd read them in those historical romance novels (bodice-rippers). Hope that helps!!
no subject
Date: 2006-03-13 11:03 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-13 11:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-13 11:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-14 08:13 pm (UTC)Would "phallus" sound too much like kinky Latin poetry?
Sounds more like the penis/genitals on a cadaver to me.
*very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-13 01:06 pm (UTC)But... *loves cock and dick*
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-13 03:27 pm (UTC)Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-13 03:41 pm (UTC)Also, I am just wary of euphemisms in general, and especially in sex writing. Just say it--the simpler the better. Things like "hard member" or whatever just end up being silly (that one in particular always has me going, "Member of what?")
I think if one person can love another person, and love their body in all its crudity--call a cock a cock--then that's romantic to me. *shrug*
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 12:31 am (UTC)Personally, I think the easiest way to build a comfort level with us, the readers, is to simply use penis in the description, and let the characters say whatever is IC for them (whether that's saying 'I love your dick' or not). We suspend our comfort level for the character's communication, but not the writer's - usually. Am I making any sense?
Yes, hard member is just bad. Making it too abstract takes away the intimacy of the writing and ruins your intent when it comes to conveying the smut.
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 12:54 am (UTC)This is why I'm really curious to know specifically what context
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 01:05 am (UTC)Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 01:14 am (UTC)I find myself unable to separate the word 'cock' from the image of a rooster, or (sexually speaking) a dark sex scene, akin to rape. I have no idea why the sexual connotation is that way for me - it just is.
Hahahaha, oh yeah. Context might be important, here. *hits self*
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 01:21 am (UTC)What? Um? Hey, did someone say my name? No? No one did? Okay then, I'll just go run and hide this... what? I don't have any fanfiction behind my back. I'm not hiding anything. Oh, look, it's a flying purple people eater! ::runs off::
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 01:58 am (UTC)But, really, we're all guilty of this, I think. Sex really is difficult to address, no matter how much we try to desensitize ourselves to it. Just listen in on one high school conversation to know what I mean. ;D
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 03:07 am (UTC)Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 08:51 am (UTC)Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 10:28 am (UTC)Thank you, and good...mid-morning.
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 01:22 pm (UTC)Er, you're welcome? Good morning (here, at least)!
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 12:37 am (UTC)Also, I am just wary of euphemisms in general, and especially in sex writing. Just say it--the simpler the better. Things like "hard member" or whatever just end up being silly (that one in particular always has me going, "Member of what?")
I have the same problem. I didn't really expect to get anything useful out of this post, but there was always the slim hope that someone might inform me of the brilliant and perfect word I'd never thought of before that manages to be romantic without being crude or ridiculous.
Re: *very weird comment out of context*
Date: 2006-03-14 12:49 am (UTC)*is so going to hell for that*
you are going to the special hell for that pun!
Date: 2006-03-14 12:53 am (UTC)Re: you are going to the special hell for that pun!
Date: 2006-03-14 12:56 am (UTC)(And God, it's one in the frickin' morning here. Why am I awake and talking about this?)
Re: you are going to the special hell for that pun!
Date: 2006-03-14 01:03 am (UTC)Re: you are going to the special hell for that pun!
Date: 2006-03-14 10:25 am (UTC)And hey, I finally thought of another penis-word that I don't hate: shaft. It's not very versatile, though. You don't want to be, like, "She looked down at his shaft." *snicker*
Ooh! Or, you could play up the hardness angle. And...that's probably more advice than you really wanted from me.
Re: you are going to the special hell for that pun!
Date: 2006-03-14 08:11 pm (UTC)I've noticed that before as a potential alternative that doesn't always fall into silly or crude.
You don't want to be, like, "She looked down at his shaft."
Thanks to you I'm going to be thinking about that line and cracking up ALL DAY. It'll randomly come out in conversations: "So I went to Albertsons and she looked down at his shaft."
Re: you are going to the special hell for that pun!
Date: 2006-03-14 08:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-13 03:29 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-13 04:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-14 12:34 am (UTC)This is why it's such a conundrum: either it sounds crude or ridiculous.
Garden and bird imagery?
Date: 2006-03-14 01:08 am (UTC)